What Women Want
As part of the International Women's Day initiative, we are covering an article on "What Women Want". This is based on the book "What Women Want," by Daniel Bergner, a writer for The New York Times Magazine.
This article is for anyone who wants to:
a. understand women better
b. get new perspectives on sex and relationships
c. uncover more about one's own sexuality
Social norms often dictate women's sexuality, and simplify it.
Ancient texts and religions reveal that the repression of women's sexuality has long been present since the early days. Then, in the sixteenth centure, when male scientists discovered the role of the ovum for reproduction. Because women could conceive regardless of whether they felt desire, men concluded that there is little reason to pay attention to female pleasure.
In modern times, women are supposedly the more restrained sex. This is a stereotype that that encourages women to behave in the way that we think they should. The problem hence lies: whether it is through religion, social convention or science, women are told how to feel and act. It is a combination of these influences that perpetuate the status quo.
Men and Women's Sexual Desires
Men has long been compared to animals tamed by society, as creatures that express their true nature in socially acceptable ways, such as watching pornography or casting predatory glances at women on the street. On the other hand, women are said to long for emotional safety and monogany - the direct opposite of the wild and restive desires of men. In reality, the range and power of women's desire might be completed understood.
Dr. Chivas, a scientist specialising in sexology conducted an experiment with a plethysmograph. This is a light sensor that could be placed inside the vagina to measure women's reactions to provocative footages. The women watched a variety of scenes: heterosexual and homosexual intercourse, masturbation and even bonobos mating. The conclusion was astounding. Women, regardless of sexual orientation, were aroused by all kinds of footage, even images of copulating apes. Men, however, reacted along more predictable lines. This study showed that women often misunderstand their own desire.
Women's sexuality is complicated by anatomy and social environment
Anatomy could be one factor that led to this differing awareness of women's own sexuality. While men could easily tell that they are aroused from teenage years onwards, from how the penises grow and shrink from sexual excitement, it is often harder for women.
In additional experiments by Dr. Chivers, it was revealed that women's desire does not necessarily fit into societal standards. This seems to debunk the assumption that the female libido thrives on emotional connection alone.
The complexity of women's desire can be explored through their fantasties. Nine different surveys asked women if they were fantasized about being overpowered or coerced into sex. The results gathered from 355 college women revealed that 62 percent had had such fantasties at least once.
One possible explanation is that being desired is central to women's libidos. Women's sexual desires, according to Professor Meana, depend heavily on the extent to which they feel desired by their partner. Particularly in cultures where sex is a taboo topic, some women may find a way to embrace their own sexual drive through such fantasies, while avoiding the shame imposed on them. For example, they might fantasize about being raped, because this way they have no reason to be ashamed of wanting sex.
Viagra for men and what for women?
While men have viagra, the industry has been trying to find an equivalent drug for women. Exploring the psychological and physical issues surrounding desires, researchers have uncovered interesting results. They foudn that women's sexual issues are usually more psychological than genital or hormonal. One study showed that the thrill of a new relationship could easily cancel out the hormonal effects.
The theory of women being mor earoused when they are the object of desire seems to provide part of the explanation. Within the confines of monogamy, a woman feels that her partner is trapped and that she is no longer the object of desire. As such, her partner no longer has any choice, and so the feeling of being desire dissipates.
The point about the G-spot
Thought the G-spot has been studied since the 1940s, it still remains a mystery. During the 1980s, a book on the topic exerted that the G-spot was to be found along the interior of the vaginal front wall. According to the researchers, it induces powerful orgasms, even though its existence has yet to be scientifically proven. While this is difficult to prove, one thing is certain. Some women are able to orgasm without the assistance of any physical touch, literally thinking themself to climax! It does seem to prove that the brean is a sexual organ as power as any other.
In this modern day, it seems that myths and stereotypes about women's sexuality and desire can be debunked. Women are not the less desirous sex; they may be as or even more sexually driven than men. Notwithstanding, women's desire remains to be further researched and explored, and it is still a generally unchartered territory.
If you like this summary and want to find out more, please check out What Women Want by Daniel Bergner.
Adapted from The 4-Hour Body by Timothy Ferriss, this article is for people who has a desire to lose weight, to sleep better, and of course, to have great sex!
Learn from the research of others
Instead of testing and trying new methods, you can rely on research that has been done by medical pratitioners and the world's best athletes.
Start with the Minimum Effective Dose (MED)
The first thing to learn is the importance of the Minimum Effective Dose. Created by Arthur Jones, a leading specialist in exercise science. Based on his research, he identified the minimum amount of effort required to produce the desired outcome. Interestingly, anything more than the MED would be affect the end result in a negative way.
Based on this, Brian MacKenzie, a triathlete and Ironman competitor, changed his training schedule. Using the MED method, he switched from his usual 30 hours-per-week routine to a 6.5 hours-per week routine. Result? He was placed fourth in the most intense race in the world.
Losing Weight the Harajuku Moment
One of the proven methods to lose weight is the slow-carb diet. Within 30 days of using it, the author was able to drop 9kg without any exercise. There are a few rules to abide by:
1. Stop eating white carbohydrates. This includes all kinds of rice, bread, noodles, potatoes, pasta, cereal, etc.
2. Keep eating the same meals. There is a small selection including main proteins (eggs, beef, pork, chicken breast or thigh), legumes (beans and lentils). Included too are vegetables (broccoli, cauliflower, asparagus, peas, green beans, etc.)
3. Avoid drinking calories. Avoid milk, soy milk, fruit juices and soft drinks. Instead, drink water, including unsweetened tea or coffee. Red wine is okay in moderation, but always keep away from beer.
4. No fruits. This is because fruits contain fructose, which is a type of sugar.
5. Give yourself a cheat day. This is because binge-eating once a week increases your metabolism and stimulates fat loss. (!!)
To recall the Harajuku Moment, read this excerpt. Here’s how Chad recounts the psychological shift that empowered his impressive physical transformation :
“I was in Tokyo with a group of friends. We all went down to Harajuku to see if we could see some artistically dressed youngsters and also to shop for fabulous clothing, which the area is famous for. A couple of the people with us were pretty fashionable dressers and had some specific things in mind they wanted to buy.
After walking into shops several times and leaving without seriously considering buying anything, one of my friends and I gave up and just waited outside while the others continued shopping. We both lamented how unfashionable we were. I then found myself saying the following to him: ‘For me, it doesn’t even matter what I wear; I’m not going to look good anyway.’ I think he agreed with me. I can’t remember, but that’s not the point.
The point was that, as I said those words, they hung in the air like when you say something super-embarrassing in a loud room but happen to catch the one randomly occurring slice of silence that happens all night long. Everyone looks at you like you’re an idiot. But this time, it was me looking at myself critically. I heard myself say those words and I recognized them not for their content, but for their tone of helplessness. I am, in most of my endeavors, a solidly successful person.
I decide I want things to be a certain way, and I make it happen. I’ve done it with my career, my learning of music, understanding of foreign languages, and basically everything I’ve tried to do. For a long time, I’ve known that the key to getting started down the path of being remarkable in anything is to simply act with the intention of being remarkable. If I want a better-than-average career, I can’t simply ‘go with the flow’ and get it.
Most people do just that: they wish for an outcome but make no intention-driven actions toward that outcome. If they would just do something most people would find that they get some version of the outcome they’re looking for. That’s been my secret.
Stop wishing and start doing. Yet here I was, talking about arguably the most important part of my life— my health— as if it was something I had no control over. I had been going with the flow for years. Wishing for an outcome and waiting to see if it would come. I was the limp, powerless ego I detest in other people. But somehow, as the school nerd who always got picked last for everything, I had allowed ‘not being good at sports’ or ‘not being fit’ to enter what I considered to be inherent attributes of myself.
The net result is that I was left with an understanding of myself as an incomplete person. And though I had (perhaps) overcompensated for that incompleteness by kicking ass in every other way I could, I was still carrying this powerlessness around with me and it was very slowly and subtly gnawing away at me from the inside.
Advanced Occam's Protocol Method
An advanced form involves weightlifting exercises. This includes the overhead squat, where you perform ten squats and lift a barbell at the same time. To do so, you need to position both of your feet further apart than shoulder width. Make sure your knees are bent about 45 degrees and your thighs are parallel to the floor.
You can refer to this guide by the "fourhourbodycouple".
The secret to the workout is in the 5/5 cadence. This means in every workout you do, you move in a 5 seconds up, 5 seconds down motion. This ensure constant maximum load on your muscles at all times. This will eliminate momentum that most weight lifters use to help them finish their sets. The reward of doing 5/5 cadence? You only do ONE set. That's right. One set. In that one set, you must hit 7 repititions, but if you can do more, do more. It's one set to failure. 10 minutes after each workout, you'll want to do more. Don't do more. Just stick to the same two exercises in each workout.
WORKOUT A: (Machine Option)
Workout (A) consists of two primary lifts + (optional) abdominal exercises from “six minute Abs”
I. Close-Grip Supinated (palms facing you) Pull Down x 7 reps (5/5 count)
II. Machine Shoulder Press x 7 reps (5/5 count)
III. Two Abdominal Exercises from “Six-Minute Abs”Movement #1: Thy Myotatic Crunch
1.Start with your arms stretched overhead as high as you can. Keep your arms next to your ears for the entirety of the exercise.
2. Lower your arms under control 4 seconds until your fingers touch the floor.
3. Pause at the bottom for 2 seconds.
4. Rise under control and pause in the upper fully contracted position for 2 seconds.
5. Repeat for a total of 10 repetitions.
Movement # 2: The Cat Vomit Exercise (Optional)
1. Get on all fours (arms and legs) and focus your gaze either directly under your head or slightly in front of you. Do not arch your back or strain your neck, as this will cause undue stress.
2. Forcefully exhale from your mouth until air is fully expelled.
3. Hold your breath and pull your belly button upward toward your spine as hard as you can, for a target of 8-12 seconds.
4. Inhale fully through the nose after the 8-12 second hold.
We have reached the end of Part I. We will cover Part II and Part III next.
Forget ageing gracefully - instead, here's how to age youthfully! Keep a healthy glow, look radiant and exude sunshine positivity and confidence with our tips to look fabulous, no matter how young or old you are!
1. Smile, Wide!
Young, middle-aged, and older individuals studied thousands of photographs and were asked to guess the age of models with various facial expressions. Neutral expressions yielded the most accurate results, and fearful expressions made subjects look older; happy faces were rated as younger than they really were. In short, a smile makes you younger than what you really are!
2. Frame Your Face
Keeping your eyebrows well-groomed and shaped helps provide a frame for your face and draws attention to your eyes. You don’t just need to shape your eyebrows, you need to groom them, too. “Brushing through your brows with a spooly brush helps keeps hairs in place, exfoliates the skin under your brows and increases blood flow,” Gafni says. “This not only helps your brows look their best, it encourages hair turnover and growth.”
3. Cleanse and moisturize regularly
Cleansing and moisturizing helps protect skin and keep it healthy; but banish regular soap, which can be drying for older skin. Instead, use a cleanser that gently washes without stripping skin of its natural moisture. Avoid skin toners, especially those with a stringent or alcohol base, or use a non-alcohol version like our Tightening Toner, which contains the acclaimed azeloglicina, a whitening agent. Follow with a good moisturizer, morning and night.
4. Follow a Consistent Facial Regime
The advances in technology means that you are able to harness proven technologies such as Radio Frequency and Red Light facials to boost your facial and neck collagen to tighten your skin and remove pigmentation and lines at an affordable price. Just like going to the gym, a consistent disciplined approach will mean that you are able to not only slow down the ageing process, but also potentially look younger. Wellaholic's Elight Facial Collagen Boost has monthly unlimited packages that will do just that without breaking the bank!
5. Load up on antioxidants
Antioxidants like vitamins A and C and the newest “it” fountain of youth antioxidant fight against free radicals, helping you maintain a younger appearance. “When free radicals from diet or the environment threaten to damage skin cells, antioxidants fight against these compounds and protect skin cells,” Palinski-Wade says. “Diets rich in antioxidants may help to fight against damage from the sun and the environment, and protect against inflammation which accelerates aging.” Eat oranges, strawberries, blueberries, bell peppers, and spinach to reap these benefits. Alternatively, try our Life's Promise Multivitamins for a boost of vitamins and minerals, or our Harvard Medical School-researched W+ Resveratrol, which is a powerful antioxidant with anti-ageing properties.
6. Cut down on sugar and salt
A healthy, youthful body needs healthy nutrients—and to avoid unhealthy ones. “Added sugars and excessive salt intake can increase inflammation in the body, which can accelerate the aging process,” Palinski-Wade says. “Inflammation produces enzymes that break down collagen in the skin. The end result is accelerated wrinkling and sagging of the skin, leading to an aged appearance.” One study found people with a high blood sugar level were perceived to be older; another found salt increased cell aging in overweight people.
7. Treat aging skin
“Age spots” are really sun-damaged skin. “The key to removing age spots is to exfoliate skin to remove the darkened areas,” Dr. Patel says. Lightening serums may work, and professional chemical peels or laser removal are options, too. “People concerned about age-related spots should consult with their board-certified dermatologist on the best treatment for their case,” Dr. Patel says. Wellaholic's Flawless Face Serum contains Retinyl Palmitate - which helps to accelerate the exfoliation of the skin dermis and hence works in tandem with the Elight Facial to renew and regenerate the skin quickly.
Being happy is the best feeling a human can have. There is a difference, however, between being happy and genuinely happy. When you're happy, it is only for that moment or a short period of time before that cloud comes back over you. When you're genuinely happy, however, it feels as if nothing can bring you down and everything is going right. The only way to become genuinely happy is to start being happy now.
One of the best ways to accomplish this, life altering task, is to understand that there is always a reason to smile.
A smile is the beginning of being happy. One smile can change your attitude. I'm not saying force a smile because that is fake happiness which is worse than holding in your emotions. But, when there is a day when everything seems like hell came up and punched in the face, you can always find a reason to smile.
Look around you and find out what it is that makes you happy. It may be your friends, family or a memory but if it makes you smile then it reminds you why you want to get away from that gloomy attitude and live your happy life again. A lot of the times it can be the little things. Events that seem to suck the life out of your day are not the only things that occurred. Look more into your day and find those small things that made you smile even when you thought you couldn't.
Choosing to be happy not only affects you, but all the people around you. Whether you know it or not, people's actions and emotions can be influenced by yours.
Be around happy people. If a person is smiling all the time, you will think, "Why the hell are you always happy," and come to realize that person is living a great life because they are always smiling. There is something inspiring about a person who can look at everything and always find the good in it. These are the type of people who have figured out how to live a genuinely happy life and who everyone should be around.
And of course, let Team Wellaholic help you to smile more confidently! With only $99 per single session or $199 for Unlimited monthly sessions (up to once a week), we promise you that you will be grinning from ear to ear!!